Now I Remember Why...

Whenever you run into an old acquaintance from your high school days, inevitably someone suggests that you need to keep in touch and/or get together with the "old gang." This most often seems like a completely legitimate and rational idea. I guess it would be nice to chew the fat with some of those with whom we grew up? However now I remember why I never kept in touch with some people, or even hung out with them regularly back in the day for that matter. Thanks, Facebook!

I approved a friend request of a girl I attended school with and for a few days we exchanged pleasantries and small talk, etc.. Then late one evening I am surfing the net and notice this girl has posted an entry about this unconventional group attempting to educate young women about the dangers of breast cancer. Fair enough, I think to myself. That is certainly a serious and important subject. However the advertising slogan of said group reads "Squeeze Your Boobies. Are You squeezing Them?" Now one would gather that this campaign is meant to be light-hearted and to make comfortable those who feel uncomfortable about such a subject. At least that's the way I took it. I innocently made a remark that there had to be a joke in there somewhere and left it at that. Well apparently this was a heinous enough statement to awaken the self-righteous bitch I have long since forgotten?

In no uncertain terms I was informed my humor was not appreciated and that breast cancer is "NO JOKE." Okay, I can understand such reasoning and I was prepared to make a retraction and offer an apology. Then I notice a further comment about how people "can be so ignorant!" Now I may not be the most sensitive guy but isn't it fair to construe the use of the term "boobies" as containing an element of humor? Suddenly I am portrayed as the posterboy rooting for cancer. I mean, what the fuck? Is it "ignorant" to poke a little fun at such an innapropriate marketing slogan or is the ignorance immediately declaring me some sort of sadistic bastard for simply pointing out the attempt at humor by the breast cancer awareness group? Cancer has certainly had an effect on my own family but I see some people deal with it differently that others.

I guess I learned my lesson about rekindling old relationships? Some people just can't get over themselves and move past their self-importance. I guess I should have known better than to have said anything at all? There is a reason people remain friends throughout life and there is equal reasoning why some do not. Well I did in fact apologize because it needed to be done but in reality this bitch can eat it as far as I'm concerned. Life is too short to take yourself that seriously and it's diseases like cancer that are testimony to that fact. Feel free to mope and be miserable all the rest of your days but at least try to give others the benefit of the doubt before you condemn them for simply trying to be social as per requested.

Sears Pisses Me Off

Well it's now been five days since Sears removed my old refrigerator from my kitchen and replaced it with a $2000 piece of shit that doesn't work. They sure are quick to take my money but trying to resolve this issue though telephone operators located in India is enough for me to take my business elsewhere indefinitely. Customer service seems to be a concept foreign to anyone outside of America. If I say Saturday is not an acceptable delivery date, as I won't be home and I need a fridge now and not four days from now, the correct answer is not "We can deliver it Saturday." You fucking said that already!

So today Sears sends out a technician to "fix" a brand new appliance, so before I explode and demand a new unit I'll let this guy have at it. After wasting all day waiting for him to arrive and then for him to do his thing, he informs me in his impossible to understand Balkan accent that the parts needed will take a week to arrive. So the operator tried their hardest to convince me to accept a fix instead of a replacememt appliance, obviously so as to not inconvenience the sham that is Sears-Roebuck and Company, and as a courtesy I did so thinking if the fix works then my problem is solved. So instead of just replacing my item whenever they can get to it I now have to wait even longer for the parts needed to fix an appliance that should be replaced anyway? Holy Shit! Have you people ever heard of overnight delivery? Put the fucking parts on a plane and fix this damn icebox before I load it in my truck and drive stright through the front door of your crappy store and put it back right where I found it!

Now my wife is expecting so obviously she cannot eat any of the food that hasn't been properly refrigerated, therefore I have lost it all. Now I need to go to the store everyday to buy perishables like milk and eggs and ice and every fucking thing that should be in my new refrigerator. When I ask customer service what am I supposed to do for a refrigerator until they finally get off of their asses and bring me a replacement they just say the same thing. We can deliver it on Saturday. So now I can't use my 15th row tickets to the Syracuse vs. Notre Dame game or I won't get the fridge until a week from Thursday? Fuck you, Sears! Fuck you! I am in the market for a new washer and dryer, dishwasher and stove as well and you can rest assured that the very last place I will consider buying them is from your shitty and completely indifferent outfit.

Update: After making arrangements to have somebody at my house on Saturday to help me take care of this clusterfuck so I can go to the ball game, I get a call from the Sears automated phone service telling me my new refrigerator will be delivered on Sunday. WTF? So now my playoff football plans get fucked just like last Sunday? I'll be taking this gripe straight to the friggin' CEO!