Forum Captains

Are you the type who enjoys posting on internet forums? Do you ever wonder why everyone constantly gives you shit for the content of your posts? Well fret not my friends because there is a simple explanation as to why this is and it is as plain as the nose on your face. I have discovered that anyone who disagrees with me sucks ass. They spend their days formulating witty comebacks and refuse to accept my brilliance as fact and in the literary world this is called a major character flaw. Nobody cares about their interpretation of how any given forum should be managed and what is construed as "proper behavior." You are only running your mouth anonymously with bad porn cued in your media player, paused until you can submit your latest pathetic attempt at trying to top the untopable, because you are a loser that has yet to encounter my wrath. For every PM you send me explaining my perceived deficiencies I get ten more informing me that my biggest critics are fags with no lives. People love me, you see, because I call a spade a spade, or in your case calling a douchebag a complete and utter moron. You need to face the fact that I am the authority on all things pertinent and no amount of your sniveling will ever change that. Nobody cares about your opinion because I have already provided all that is needed to be known on whatever subject is at hand. Forum captains cannot bear to face reality so every other post they submit starts with the word why. Why do you always say that? Why do you not listen to me? Why are you so awesome? Why don't you fuck off and die? Ah ha! It's about time you said something relevent.