Why Bill Frist Blows

The reasons are simply too numerous to mention, but I'll start with what I call my "favorite 3."

1) This heartless bastard would adopt pets so as to provide himself the research subjects needed to "succeed in the highly competitive atmosphere of medical school," and then proceed to cut out their hearts to do his precious research. In his own words he said he went "a little crazy" and that his actions were "a heinous and dishonest thing to do." Do you really think so, Bill?

2) This mind control zealot insists upon requiring unprovable and faith-based doctrine in the classroom, forcing school children of all persuations to learn his beliefs of Intelligent Design as scientific fact. Apparently legislating scientific theory lends credence to the proof of hypotheses?

3) Once again in an act to save us from ourselves, and to cater to the gaming industry, good old Billy boy came after internet poker with both guns-a-blazing. Apparently free Americans are not capable of choosing how and where to spend their hard-earned post-tax dollars so he helped shove an anti-freedom online gaming enforcement act into a port security bill at the last minute during the eleventh hour of the 106th Congress. Now who doesn't want port security, right? Of course horse racing was exempt because that industry is an excellent source of campaign revenue. Now poker players are forced to utilize underground sources of finance to enjoy the game they love, which is undoubtably aiding in the funding of terrorism. Ain't that a peach?