You know the kind I am talking about, the ones you can hear coming from a mile away? The ironic part is that those mega-low bass frequencies that are being used to announce the approach of a super douche bag are actually too long of a sound wave for said douche bag to even hear, given his proximity to the source. Naturally we turn to look, since our primitive brains are hardwired to react to stimuli that could be possible danger, and what do we see? Normally it is some half rusted bottom shelf Mazda plastered with those cheap plastic aftermarket fake chrome trim pieces, sadly attached with double-sided tape to anywhere they will stick. Nice ride tough guy. Is that four-banger at least the 2.0 liter version? I am guessing you scrapped a perfectly good automatic transmission and replaced it with some cheap two gear shift kit, for performance reasons of course? A lot of good that does with a three inch clearance from the road. I bet those rims mom got you for Christmas cost more than your entire car?
Look, I was young once and I know the importance of having a cool car for cruising around in the high school circles. I don't hold that against you. What does piss me off however is your incessant need to drive through quiet residential neighborhoods at all hours of the night with your amplifiers overheating as they pump out needless bottom end. Some people have to actually get up before the sun comes up and go to work so your mom can get paid on the first of the month. Do us all a favor and flatten the left side of that equalizer so I can save the last of my 12 gauge rocksalt shells, not that your paint job couldn't use the touch up.
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